Should Bride’s Sister Walk Her Down The Aisle Against Objections From Her Fiancé and His Family?

Traditionally, the bride is walked down the aisle by her Dad or parents. However, the original poster (OP) is not from a traditional upbringing. Her older half-sister raised her. She never met her dad; their mom OD’d when she was 10, and her sister was 19. Her sister’s dad was still in her life and was willing to support her, but not the OP. Her sister chose to be OP’s guardian and sacrificed a lot to raise her in her 20s, she didn’t go to college, and her father’s family cut off relations.

 When she got engaged, the OP told her sister that besides being her maid of honor (MOH), she also wanted her to be the one to walk her down the aisle. All her life, her sister fulfilled many roles for her — big sister, mother, father, and friend — and OP thought it felt right that those multiple roles would be honored on one of the biggest days of her life.

She and her sister were ecstatic, but he objected when OP brought it up with her fiancé. He said her sister could be the MOH, but it wasn’t appropriate for her to walk the OP down the aisle since a man usually does it, and his father can fulfill the role since she doesn’t have male relatives. Also, the OP explained that her future in-laws are very traditional, and he expected that his wedding would be a conventional white one.

OP told him that she appreciated his father’s willingness to fill that role but that the one she wanted was her sister, so she should be the one to give her away. An argument ensued, spreading to her future in-laws, with his mom acknowledging her sister’s importance to her, but it’s also her fiance’s wedding, and she shouldn’t be putting my sister before him on his day.

Her sister said she didn’t mind being the MOH and didn’t want to turn my happy day into something stressful. OP doesn’t want to concede to her fiancé or parents.

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The Masses Weigh In

The Reddit community was quick to rally behind OP. Here are some of the top-voted comments that were shared with OP.

One Redditor suggested that her father-in-law walk the groom down the aisle and stay with him at the front of the church while the sister walked the OP down the aisle. When everyone is up at the front, his father and her sister can place the bride’s right hand into the groom’s left hand, signifying a new union. And this Redditor added, “Or….the fiancé can get off his high horse and understand that his bride gets to choose who walks her down the aisle, and the in-laws get no opinion here.”

Another said, ” Seriously, a bride putting herself first on her own wedding day? If you can’t put yourself first on this day, then when can you?

Another Redditor said, “This is VERY telling of how he sees gender roles. I have to question if other things like this have arisen during your relationship. Does he help with housework? Laundry? Dishes? Or do you do them because they are “woman” chores?” To this comment, the OP shared she was in medical school, and her fiance does help with preparing meals and doing laundry.

The OP’s comment gave her even more support. Many were concerned for her and wondered why she was marrying this guy.  A Redditor said, “OP, he is going to get you pregnant and convince you to leave medicine to be a stay-at-home parent and a traditional wife!”

This Redditor said, “I would have serious reservations about marrying someone who was blatantly dismissive of your plan to honor your sister who raised you.”

***Is the OP in the right, or is she wrong? Should OP reconsider getting married to her fiance and joining his family?  How would you have reacted in this situation?

Read the full post here.

This article was produced and syndicated by The Cents of Money.

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