We all have those things we would rather not admit to anyone. They could be insecurities or random facts about ourselves that we feel better keeping in than letting out. They might also be rare things people won’t relate to — or they could be pretty relatable. Out of curiosity, a woman asked men what they were scared to admit, and she got some answers. Here are ten interesting ones.
1. Being Vulnerable
Men being scared to admit vulnerability makes a lot of sense. From childhood, they are taught that being vulnerable equals being weak. It can make us forget that men are still human and humans are supposed to be vulnerable, at least to the people we trust. A commenter admits: “I’m scared. I’m worried. I’m nervous. I just want to be held and told that I’m doing okay.” No one should ever feel afraid to express these feelings.
2. Body-Related Issues
Men also struggle with body-related issues. It is common for women to voice this struggle, making it seem like all men are 100% okay with their bodies. That’s a faux assumption, and the comments are there to prove it. Social media and its unrealistic standards don’t help matters. Men face this struggle, and most can’t speak up for many reasons.
3. Voicing Appreciation
“Wanting people to be proud of us,” someone says. Most men spend their lives ensuring everyone else is doing alright and hardly get appreciated out loud. Not to mention, “Society puts a hefty load on men about success; even if it’s not success, it’s moderate consistency.” The comment continues: “I think men strive for validation no matter what they do.” A little more appreciation would go a long way.
4. Mental Health Struggles
The idea that men should only be tough and not talk about their feelings should be thrown away because it is unrealistic and highly unfair. Men also struggle with mental health issues, and when they can’t talk about it or ask for help, guess where it leads to? They have anxiety issues and feel depressed, too. Society should deal with it and cut them some slack.
Men are more reluctant to admit their loneliness; they prefer to keep it in and act like all is well. The older we get, the more busy everyone is with their lives and the harder it is for us to make new friends.
Numerous comments show that men also struggle with this: “We are invisible to most of society if we are single….” Another says, “As a 28-year-old man, the level of loneliness and lack of friendships is tough sometimes. I go full weekends with little to no interaction from other people at times….”
6. Breakups Hurt Men Too
Breakups hurt men, too, even though most prefer to act like they don’t care or hide their emotions. The stigma associated with men expressing pain and sadness might be why they do not show their emotions openly. But yes, they ugly-cry, too, bingeing on Celine Dion and Adele.
7. Hair Loss
Yes, men care about their hair and dread hair loss. This fear can increase their stress levels and low self-esteem and, in extreme cases, cause depression. The sad part is that stress can sometimes make the hair fall out. So stressing doesn’t help at all. We might not understand it, but it is a struggle for many men.
8. Fear Of Commitment
A man shares his thoughts: “A lot of us are scared to commit because we can’t tell the difference between if you love us (the individual) or the way we make you feel.” That sounds very relatable. Most men would rather not admit that they fear commitment or the reason for it. It doesn’t help that some people don’t care about hurting others or taking advantage of them.
9. Being Ashamed
Feeling ashamed is a normal reaction when embarrassing things happen or even when we do things we aren’t proud of. Most adults were made to feel shame as kids, and they grew up with that mindset. It doesn’t help when they still meet people who tend to put them down and manipulate them. The thing is, everyone feels shame, but many men would rather not admit that.
10. Imposter Syndrome
Anybody and everybody can experience imposter syndrome, but the expression differs. Gender norms and the fear of backlash might make most men hide these feelings. A contributor shares their personal experience, “I don’t know why,” they begin, “But I feel like an imposter in everything I do. My job, my hobbies, and even my relationships at times. And I’m afraid of looking like a poser.”
Being shy and quiet is not a gender issue, but men who are quiet around new people because of shyness are afraid to admit so. Shyness in men is common, but they fear being boring. Other people often mock men in a way they wouldn’t do with quiet women. For some, it takes a long time to get comfortable around people and open up. They often feel out of place but appreciate people breaking the ice with them.
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This article was initially published and syndicated by The Cents of Money.